Yemi Osinbajo – Shed No Tears

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Yemi Osinbajo

I hear you want to cry. Why should you, can’t you be a man? So they have side-stepped your ineffective committee and set up another one reporting directly to the President? What is wrong with that? Look my brother these things happen everywhere. You suddenly wake up to the reality that you are no longer of any kind of relevance. When Nicholas did it to me, I kept my face straight and continued until the man sacked me three months later. Your case is even better, nobody can sack you, we voted for you. So don’t fret and concentrate on other areas of your duty like visiting old people’s homes and state funerals.

In fact, this even gives you more time to face VGC Estate issues like flooding and the overcharge they are paying for power.

Seriously, when I first heard of that Trader Moni thing, I weak. How can you for the life of me even attempt to sell that as an effective economic tool? How sustainable is that and what is the reach? Where is the money now? What data did you use in arriving at the beneficiary list and what structure for monitoring and regulation was put in place? What I saw was you just jumping from market to market and dropping monies like Wizkid throwing money at his fans. It was at that point I knew that something like this will happen to you. You see even illiterates like me, know that you cannot jump- start a huge economy like ours by throwing some meaningless cash at hapless traders who eventually lose the funds to ‘agberos’ immediately you enter your air-conditioned limousine and the cameras pack up. Anyways, the only advice I can give you at this point is to remain calm, don’t panic and certainly don’t show fear.

Recalibrate and focus on areas of your core competence and leave the economy to those who sabi. Let’s concentrate on the $9 billion judgment, xenophobia and what we can get when Mugabe’s Will is finally read. Me, I am beginning to like Buhari. Finally, please before you go to bed every night, kindly be singing this song – he that is down, fears no fall………. and you will be ok. Trust me.