Buhari The Brand Ambassador For London

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By Reno Omokri

Since he was sworn into office as President of Nigeria on May 29, 2015, President Buhari has spent a total 177 days vacationing in London (he is still there as you read this) and ZERO days vacationing in Nigeria. It almost seems as if Muhammadu Buhari cannot wait to get out of Nigeria.

His frequent tours and holidays to the United Kingdom leads me to ask if the city of London appointed him as its brand ambassador? I mean, how can Buhari expect foreigners to invest in or visit Nigeria when he cannot even holiday in Nigeria?

And this is a man who never ceases to complain, gripe and blame the Peoples Democratic Party and its Presidents, yet all of the Presidents produced by the PDP holidayed in Nigeria.

President Yar’adua for one was renowned for holidaying at Obudu Cattle Ranch even with his illness. President Obasanjo holidayed at his farm in Ota while President Jonathan vacationed at Otuoke. Yet these are the men that President Buhari, a man under whom Nigeria has her first recession in a quarter century, continues to blame for all the woes Nigeria faces.

In fast, after wasting three years blaming Jonathan and the PDP for everything and then some, I would have expected the Muhammadu Buhari led All Progressives Congress-led government not to waste the last year of their failed government fighting Bukola Saraki. Let them think about those to whom they promised change and change their ways.

But back to the issue at hand, why won’t the President deign to vacation in Nigeria? About the only thing Buhari does in Nigeria is that he makes his money here. Almost every other thing is done outside Nigeria. He educated and still educated his children abroad (how can he afford it, seeing as he claimed to have taken a loan to pay for his APC Presidential nomination form?). He accesses his healthcare needs abroad. His government even floated an idea of importing grass for cattle from Brazil.

For all intents and purposes, President Buhari is more of a Londoner than he is a Lagosian. He has spent more time in London than in the commercial capital of his own country.

But perhaps the most annoying thing about this frequent London tripe is the fact that Buhari announced his latest London junket at a time when multiple Nigerian soldiers lost their lives to terrorists while battling Boko Haram in Nigeria’s Northeast. Many reports have suggested that the recent deaths may be in their hundreds.

And in the midst of this, President Buhari announcer he was going on holiday. No word of condolence from the President. In July President Bush hosted French President Emmanuel Macron. There are a few things the President could learn from his French counterpart.

When French policeman, Lieutenant-Colonel Arnaud Beltrame, died on March 24, 2018, from gunshot and stab wounds after he heroically took the place of a female store clerk held hostage at a supermarket at Trèbes, President Macron stopped all his activities to attend his funeral. But here, our very own Muhammadu Buhari refuses to shift the focus from his London holiday, or his pet project (impeaching Bukola Saraki) to his duty as Commander-in-Chief.

And it is not that the Presidency cannot react quickly when it wants to. Last week, the Daily Independent ran a story to the effect that foreign powers were mounting pressure on President Buhari to drop his second term bid.

It took the Presidency mere hours to respond to the Independent’s story, yet this same Presidency has still not commented on the multiple Nigerian soldiers killed by Boko Haram.

And I had a laugh when Lai Mohammed and Garba Shehu called the Independent story fake news. Lai Mohammed and Garba complaining about fake news! Really?

If #FakeNews had a Facebook profile, under relationship status it will read ‘In a relationship with Lai Mohammed and Garba Shehu’. The two of them are the human manifestation of Fake News. Especially Garba Shehu who said ‘Buhari has exceeded his promise to Nigerians’. Even President Buhari himself must have been taken aback by that lie.

Lai Mohammed, who is now complaining about fake news is the same man who on August 14, 2018, said ‘the federal government has no hand in the calls for Saraki’s resignation or impeachment’’. And yet the very next day, Albany Lai Mohammed was on the program, Question Time on Channels Television, where he told the presenter, Gbenga Ashiru, that ‘Bukola Saraki has no moral principle’ and then went on to justify the calls for his impeachment.

Make up your mind Lai. You either hate fake news or you date fake news. Right now, you are dating FAKE NEWS!

The long and short of what I am
Trying to say is that our London vacationing President and his fake news addicted mouthpieces are so out of touch with Nigeria’s realities that it should no longer surprise anyone when they say the most outlandish things.

The call to action for Nigerians, therefore, is to ensure that they put an end to this circus of a government by ensuring that they register to vote, collect their PVCs and use it to send President Muhammadu Buhari and his government on a Permanent Vacation at no Cost!

Reno’s Nuggets
Expensive phones won’t give you rich conversations. Fools still speak foolishly on an iPhone 7 and wise men still speak wisely on an old Nokia. Expensive watches won’t make your time valuable. A Rolex on the wrist of a fool will not make him spend his time wisely #RenosNuggets