Icons gone with the wind
VIEW FROM THE GALLERY BY MAHMUD JEGA
VIEW FROM THE GALLERY BY MAHMUD JEGA
Any human person who is approaching the age of 65, as Nigeria is about to clock as an independent nation in two days’ time, unless if the Almighty blessed you with the best of health, the person is most unlikely to escape from the ravages of age. The knees are stiff; the hair is grey; hearing is impaired; eyesight is diminished; spectacles adorn the eyes; the nose does not savour the sweet smell of soups due to ravages of catarrh and Covid; the back is bent; breathing is heavy after a short walk; the arms can no longer carry a heavy bucket; memory is fading; the teeth have many gaps; the jaws are weak and cannot chew tough meat.
Wear and tear due to age afflicts not just humans but old motor vehicles as well. The engine is weak and sputtering; the shafts are creaking; the rings are bellowing smoke; the carburetor and nozzles are sputtering; the gasket is leaking; the radiator is overheating and may have already burnt the top cylinder gasket; the spark plugs no longer spark to ignite fuel in the carburetors; the battery does not start in the morning and if the car has manual engine, then it must be pushed; the lower arm is broken; the fan belt has cut, so the alternator is not charging the battery; the water pump is leaking; all the headlights are dim; the trafficator bulbs are blown; the fuel tank is leaking; the speedometer cable has cut; the throttle cable is cut; the windscreen wipers are worn down to the steel blades; the crankshaft has already been cut to the maximum 020 and the mechanic says it cannot be cut again.
Wear and tear due to age does not spare a house that is poorly maintained, as too many Nigerian houses are either because the breadwinner has retired or died, or because the house is chaotic due to inheritance battles. For a poorly maintained house, the wrought iron roof is red with rust; the ceiling is potholed; all the water pipes are leaking; the window frames are long gone; the doors have no lock; the floor tiles are dug up; no sign of the mosquito nets; the furniture is worn thin; the toilet is not flushing; the electrical cables are hanging out and the Band A NEPA meter has not been recharged for weeks.
But unlike persons, vehicles and houses, a country is supposed to keep improving with age. While grandparents’ and parents’ generations have steadily thinned out, youngsters are being born every day, and they easily out number the previous generations, such that the country’s population has multiplied several times since 1960. Only that, the new generations require as much careful maintenance as old cars and old houses, lest they be lost to the social media. If a country’s infrastructure, amenities, economic assets, political institutions and social fabric are well maintained, it should be much better at 65 then it was at 0 age. But that is a very big IF. There are some roads in Nigeria that have not been resurfaced since colonial times; some bridges built in the 1950s have been the same ever since and have lost all their railings; some radio stations have been operating the same transmitters for five decades or more; some schools, built with stone and cement since the 1930s have not expanded even though the 1963, 1973, 1991 and 2006 national population censuses all recorded huge population increases; a video was recently posted on social media of a primary school in [deleted] state where the pupils were packed together like sardines; corrugated iron roofs installed in the 1950s have become reddened with rust; some city slums that sprang up decades ago without any town planner’s touch have been the same ever since.
In many areas Nigeria has recorded major improvements; in fact in some areas, we leapfrogged directly from the Stone Age to the digital age. But some of our policemen still carry batons when bandits carry AK 49s; some judges still write with long hand while trying tech-savvy Yahoo Yahoo boys; some civil service offices still use manual typewriters, stencils and cyclostyling machines; electric typewriters, fax machines, radio telephones, scanners, personal computers, internet, smart phones and Wi-Fi all left them stranded. We have written many constitutions since the 1950s and went from one end of the world to another to copy governance systems, but Nigerian politicians still play by the rules of the 1940s. They whip up ethnic and religious sentiments; campaign for high offices without a program; shout themselves hoarse from the rostrums but say nothing substantial; and they still believe in vote buying and election rigging.
All that is not my worry today. My main worry as we prepare to celebrate Independence Day, most certainly with a public holiday on Wednesday, is that in 65 years too many iconic Nigerian things have gone with the wind [apologies to Margaret Mitchell]. Our national structure has changed beyond recognition; where are our Regions, our Provinces, our Divisions and our Native Authorities? Any Nigerian who died in the 1960s and is resuscitated today will be confused by our governance structure. He will ask, where is the Governor General, where is the Prime Minister, where are the Premiers, where are the Regional Governors, where are the Provincial Commissioners, where are the Residents, District Officers, Divisional Secretaries, Assistant District Officers and even the Adult Education Organisers? Why was it that Native Authorities maintained well-stocked libraries [called Dakin Karatu in the North] but the National Library now needs the First Lady’s donation of N20 billion to complete its shelves?
Our streets are unrecognizable to a Nigerian who died in the 1960s. Lada, Moskovich, Citroen, Volkswagen Beetle, Volkswagen Igala, Volkswagen Santana [Lawrence Anini’s official vehicle]; Land rover, Austin, Morris, Holden, Vauxhall and Commer are all nowhere to be seen. Where are our once ubiquitous superstores Kingsway, Chellarams, UTC, John Holt, Leventis, Bhojsons and G B Olivant? How can today’s youngsters not be hooked to Man U, Man City, Arsenal, Real Madrid, Paris St Germain, Bayern Munich and Deportivo de La Coruna since our great football clubs Port Harcourt Red Devils, Mighty Jets of Jos, Enugu Rangers, Bauchi Wunti, Kaduna Bees, Alyufsalam Rocks of Ilorin, Niger Tornadoes of Minna, BCC Lions of Gboko, IICC Shooting Stars of Ibadan, Bendel Insurance of Benin, P&T Vasco Da Gama of Lagos, Stationery Stores of Lagos, NEPA of Lagos, Iwuanyanwu Nationale of Owerri, Zamfara Club 50 of Gusau, El Kanemi Warriors of Maiduguri, Calabar Rovers, Abiola Babes of Abeokuta and Sahara Storms of Sokoto are either nowhere to be found or are shadows of their former selves?
On our sporting fields, who succeeded the sprinter Modupe Oshikoya, who succeeded the world-renown boxer Dick Tiger, who replaced the great goalkeepers Inuwa Rigogo and Emmanuel Okalla, which great dribbler succeeded Segun Odegbami, which captain ever inspired like Christian Chukwu, which table tennis player succeeded Kasali Lasisi, which weight lifter succeeded Oliver Orok, which Sprinter today overtook Chidi Imoh even when his 1987 record breaking sprint was declared “wind-aided,” and which sprinter took over from Mary Onyali? In the 1970s when Power Mike slammed the Hungarian Destroyer Tibor Szakacs and then demolished the [black] British Head Butt King Johny Kwango, which Gen Z wrestler repeated the feat, apart from cooking jollof rice into the Guiness Book of Records? Is that more spectacular and did it put Nigeria on the world map more than what Dick Tiger did in 1963, when he defeated Gene Fullmer in a boxing match at Las Vegas Convention Centre?
Which comedian today succeeded Afolabi Afolayan, alias Jaguar; Baba Sala, Golobo, Karkuzu na Bodara, Kasagi, and Chief Zebrudaya alias 4.30? Which football radio commentator ever succeeded Ernest Okonkwo and which other broadcasters succeeded Adamu Augie, James Audu, Sadiq Daba, Walter Oyetogun, Yinka Craig and Danladi Bako who is still around but less heard of? Many of the newspapers that for several decades informed, educated and sometimes entertained Nigerians are today either gone or hardly seen. Where is The Tide, The Chronicle; Morning Post, Statesman, The Star, Spectator, The Broom, The Voice, Standard, Herald, Triumph, Sketch, Post Express, Daily Star, The Path and Observer? Once the oldest and mightiest of them all, Daily Times, Sunday Times, Headlines and their side kick, Lagos Weekend, have all vanished from the scene, save for some epileptic resurgence on the web.
Many of the once great state institutions are nowhere to be seen now. Where is Public Works Department [PWD], Electricity Corporation of Nigeria [ECN], Niger Dams Authority [NDA], National Electric Power Authority [NEPA], Post and Telegraph [P&T], Nigeria External Communications [NET], Nigeria Telecommunications [NITEL] and Nigeria Coal Corporation? Where is Nigeria Livestock and Meat Authority? Look Nigerian Army, where is WASA [West African Social Activities] that you used to hold every year? I hear that government is about to create Forest Guards to chase bandits and terrorists out of ungoverned spaces, but where is the old Sarkin Daji of the Native Authorities, without whose permission in the olden days you could not walk into any bush and cut a tree?
In sheer glamour, Nigeria these days has no successor to Alhaji Shehu Shagari’s flowing gown; Abubakar Audu’s heavily embroidered gowns; Solomon Lar’s long cap; Malam Aminu Kano’s drab red cap; Chief Awolowo’s round glasses; Dr. Nnamdi Azikiwe’s dazzling’s neck beads; KO Mbadiwe’s big grammar; MCK Ajuluchukwu’s rapid-fire press releases; Abdulkadir Young-Sidi’s hot Latin grammar; or even Jim Nwobodo’s shining diamond ring. I was standing at a bus stop in Awka when Governor Nwobodo’s motorcade passed by; he lowered the hind glasses of his Mercedes car to greet well wishers and I saw a brilliant flash shining on the buildings nearby. I asked a fellow by-stander what that was, and he said, “Oh, Jim’s diamond ring!” Some rulers of today, do they even have brass rings to dazzle by-standers?
