Unveilling a Guide to Excellent Parenting

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In tackling lack of competent caregivers as one of the major challenges faced by parents in the 21st century, the CEO of LaPax Life Project, Emem Nwogwugwu, recently launched the ‘Parent Organiser’, to fill the lacuna, Sunday Ehigiator writes

Research has proved that the key to raising well-rounded children is to establish a solid support system at home so that they grow up satisfied with their achievements and ambitions.
Specifically, research conducted by Carol Dweck, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology at Stanford University and a leading researcher in the field of achievement and success, discovered that a person’s mindset can influence behavior.

The research posited that people with a fixed mindset are usually reluctant to take on challenges because they believe their achievements come from innate abilities, adding that those with a growth mindset are usually more willing to face challenges with hard work because they believe in always learning new skills. “Above all, keep in mind that the grade is not what motivates a top student to succeed, it’s his inner drive for learning”, adds Dweck.

And for a child to attain the required level of drive, the place of proper parenting cannot be ignored; hence the book, Parent Organiser by Emem Nwogwugwu; a guide to quality parenting.

Sharing her motherhood experience at the event to launch her organiser at Radisson Blu Hotel in Victoria Island, Lagos, Nwogwugwu, a life coach, said, “Early on in my motherhood journey, I noticed I was struggling
to keep up with my schedule for my new business, new baby and at the same time run a family without organised domestic support at home.

I had health challenges because of stress and began to lose interest in caring for myself. I knew I needed to create a plan to enable me to balance my time for God, myself, family, and a new career.

“Then two years ago, I attended an event in Lagos where a mom mentioned to me that she uses a list to organise her children’s daily schedule. That personal conversation with her stuck in my head.
I knew I needed more structure in my interactions with my daughter’s nanny and housekeeper. Eventually, I realised we could be more effective and achieve better results for my daughter using an organiser.

“It made sharing knowledge easier, and besides the positive impact at home, really complimented my skills as a life coach. I also noticed a great improvement with my daughter all around, even in her academics. I might be home or out at work and my daughter’s day would still go as planned. After so many years of using this technique and seeing great results, I thought it would help to share my daughter’s organiser with the world.

“Child upbringing is one of the most formidable tasks a parent will ever take on in life. It is even more difficult in a society like ours that is in transition.
Urbanisation has brought with it many negative influences on children. We can think of TV and some of its immoral programmes, pornographic materials such as magazines and movies, the use of alcohol and illicit drugs, the practice of the occult and its negative effects among others.
What training shall we give our children to enable them to live victoriously in such a corrupt and evil system?

“Children are a gift from God. The raising of children starts in the home. It is there that the foundation of a successful life can be laid and built upon. When a child’s personal foundations are strong, he would be able to live responsibly and contribute his quota to the development of his community and nation as well as humanity in general. If his personal foundations are weak, he could become a liability to himself, family, community, and nation.

“Children are entitled to the unconditional love of their parents. A child should not be deprived of parental love because he was not born normal, is deemed to be ugly looking, and has bad habits or whatever. The doors of love may close to him in the external environment but he should find love, peace, and happiness when he returns home. A child may involve himself in unacceptable conduct, but this should not be used against him; no parent should withhold love on the basis of the disorderly conduct of their children.

“Parents should respect their children. They are just as unique as their parents. They should not restrict but guide them to make the right choices in life. Parents should explain the importance of godly living and encourage their children to associate with godly children. They should not make them angry unnecessarily. On the other hand, they should help them become emotionally stable.”

In an interview with THISDAY afterwards, Nwogwugwu while speaking on the purpose of the book said, it is to help parents plan and organise their lives and their
children’s lives, and assist caregivers/nannies with providing the right care and keeping track of the children’s all-round progress.

Likewise, she said it will enable parents to achieve their personal life and career goals by making them more organised and efficient. She added that “I am a life coach, my company creates coaching services for individuals or organisations. We create training courses for companies based on the needs of the persons involved. We also have an advisory and consulting arm. The idea of the book came into life when I was planning a parenting masters class this year. We realised that after the parents come off the class, they go back to their normal routine. Hence, I decided to write a book, that would serve as a guide even afterward; at least for four years.

“The book is one that is going to have a positive impact on the parents, children, and even the domestic supports, caregivers or guardians to children. So you have the emotionally laden questions that help you address emotional aspects of parenting. With the guide of the book, you have emotional healing and coaching sessions in your own at home without paying anyone for it. You can plan your vision for the year, with the books vision board, it also has goal setting mechanism in there. you can literally plan your goals for your family as an adult. It also has the vision board for the children as well.”

“Aside these, it has the morning routine, food plan template, how to coach children in terms of how to read, create, and different ways on how to teach a child. It allows you to plan, it allows you to write; because it’s like a diary and an organiser.

“The major challenges of parents in this 21st century is the lack of competent caregivers. Parents don’t have the time to train their caregivers. They believe that their caregivers should be just good at cooking, bathing, getting them dressed for school or other occasions, and cleaning the house. But there is so much more they need to know in terms of bringing up the child.

“The book didn’t necessarily throw away the traditional methods of training a child, but modified them and improved on them, based on well-researched recommendations from experts. The book is actually a structure that allows you to model the old in a much better and positive way, where the child is groomed properly, and the child is groomed with love.

“There are emotional healings that help you as the caregiver or parent deal with your personal issues; because if the parents are not healed or whole, they can not take care of the child. The book is just a balance between the old ways of parenting and the modern ways of parenting. You can order for copies on our website on www.Lapaxlifeproject.com, or through our various social media platforms, and every bookstore in Lagos, Abuja and some,” she concluded.