Facility Focus: The Diminishing Domestic Work Culture in Nigeria

By Kenny Akintola

Once upon a time, having domestic staff in Nigeria was straightforward. Your nanny was like your auntie, your driver was like your uncle, and your cook was family. They were loyal, dependable, and proud of their jobs.

But in today’s Nigeria especially as a young woman, it often feels like you’re living with frenemies. The very people you employ to make life easier sometimes act like they’re competing with you. The loyalty is gone ,replaced by envy, entitlement, and in some cases, outright danger.

When the Help Becomes the “Madam”
A Lekki professional almost fainted one night while scrolling TikTok. There was her help strutting around in her wigs, rocking her designer dresses, even lying on her bed to make videos. Over 50 pictures and clips, with captions like “Soft life or nothing” and “Na me be the boss now.”
In Ikoyi, another woman got the shock of her life when her nanny posted bundles of crisp cash on Instagram stories, flexing like she just cashed out. The money wasn’t stolen it was her employer’s staged purely for “content.”
Imagine paying salaries, only to discover your staff is building an influencer career off your belongings.

Cooks, Drivers and Their Wahala

It doesn’t stop at house helps. Cooks now curate tastes. One Surulere cook refused to touch beans or yam porridge, declaring, “That one is local food, madam, I only do continental.” Another, tired of sweating in the kitchen, began ordering from a buka, plating the food, and serving it as her own.
Drivers? They’ve turned Lagos roads into adventure parks. One family’s driver vanished for hours during school run, only to return grinning: “I just dey drive small small on Third Mainland to feel breeze.” Another missed work completely because Arsenal was playing, admitting later, “Oga, if I no watch that match live, e go pain me die.”
And then there are the outright rogues. A family once hired a new driver in the morning. By evening, he had tried to steal their car. He dropped them off at a prayer meeting and sped off only to be caught in traffic when security raised alarm.

The Side Hustle Nanny

In Ajah, one nanny transformed her madam’s compound into a weekend daycare. Neighbors paid ₦5,000 per child, while she used her boss’s toys, food, and generator. When caught, she said boldly: “Madam, no vex, I just dey try support myself.”

When “Driver” Turns to Danger

Beyond the comedy, there’s a darker side. More and more reports show drivers colluding with kidnappers, robbers, and gangs.
A Festac woman discovered her driver had been feeding criminals her routine: school runs, prayer meetings, market stops. In Abuja, another employer narrowly escaped abduction when it was revealed her driver had been sharing her movements with kidnappers.
What used to be a relationship built on trust has now become a security risk. Families install trackers, demand multiple guarantors, and even keep private investigators on speed dial not to watch the roads, but the driver himself.

Agents Behaving Badly

And then there are the so-called agents. Many don’t vet staff, don’t check backgrounds, and don’t train anyone. They collect fat placement fees, drop staff into homes, and vanish when things go wrong.
Some are worse: they collude with staff, rotating them from one house to another to collect multiple commissions. One week she’s your nanny, next week she’s another madam’s nanny same staff, fresh fee. It’s a merry go round of fraud.

The Jealousy Factor

For many young female employers, there’s an unspoken tension: staff who act like they resent your lifestyle. The car you drive, the trips you take, the clothes you wear instead of motivation, it breeds envy. You see it in side comments, in the way they roll eyes when friends visit, in the way they “flex” with your belongings online.
It’s less about work now, more about watching madam’s life and wishing it was theirs.

Lagos Wahala, But With Laughter

And yet, Nigerians must laugh to cope:
• The nanny who cooked Indomie with sugar instead of salt.
• The cook who demanded Uber fare for market runs.
• The driver who promised a shortcut to Ikeja but somehow landed in Ota.

Annoying? Absolutely. Hilarious? Without doubt.

So, What’s the Way Forward?
This is not government matter ,if we wait for Abuja, we’ll wait till rapture. The solution has to be community-driven:
• Blacklists for staff and agents with repeated bad behavior.
• Verified agencies that vet, train, and monitor staff properly.
• Employers sharing information so bad eggs can’t keep circulating.
• Contracts and clear job descriptions, so there’s no room for “I didn’t know.”

Domestic service is real work. It deserves professionalism, respect, and accountability. Until then, hiring staff in Nigeria will remain a gamble like trying to find a place to park at Balogun Market on Christmas Eve.
Because right now, being a young woman with domestic staff in Nigeria sometimes feels like you’re not just paying salaries you’re funding somebody else’s TikTok career, while hoping your driver isn’t sending your location to kidnappers.
The culture of domestic staff in Nigeria has shifted from loyalty to survival, from service to envy, and sometimes, from trust to betrayal. As employers, the lesson is simple: be watchful, be firm, and above all, be safe. Till next time, stay safe.

Kenny Akintola is Chief Facility Officer, EBS