I finally took the jab o. If you follow all the gist around this thing, you will not want to go anywhere near the street. They are giving the jab talk less of entering the hall. I have been listening and reading authorities’ views and not the many charlatans who have seized the media to be pushing one conspiracy theory after the other. What pushed me was that I was told that even with the vaccine, you could still be infected but will not die. The vaccine eliminates the possibility of fatality in the event of infection. Another strong argument was the possibility of the yellow fever card being mandatory for international travel in the near future. That is how I carry myself go o. Like everything Nigerian, the Yaba Psychiatry venue was a bedlam of confusion. The temporary power this thing gives the nurses and handlers is crazy.
Come and see shouting, struggling and fighting to collect jab which is free o. Who is from Prof Lagbaja, they will scream, and that one will jump the queue. They will come again, who is from Senator Ekpu, that one will jump up and enter. So, I went to the man in charge and said, “Please, we are less than 50 here. This thing is free. Why are we still doing corruption?” He looked at me with very ugly eyes, sweating and spitting and said, ‘You mister, come back tomorrow. As long as I am here you will not take the jab today.” I ran mad. You see, this our Nigeria; we are all the problem. We are all mad, I swear. See this mumu, low-level civil servant with a smelly mouth even doing corruption in vaccine o? The vaccine that nobody is taking that they are begging people to come and take. I stood by the door and made sure nobody entered until the right thing was done.
The man, his colleagues and handlers moved against me and continued with their madness. So I called someone in Government House to ask if it was Lagos policy to have people jump queues, hoard the vaccine and ask to be settled before giving the jab. Of course, the answer was no. I don’t know who my contact called, immediately my status changed. Oga, please come and take your own. I say no. I enter my Gani Fawehinmi mode. I say no until everything is done normally and people respected. The crowd cheered, and I felt like going for election in Nsit Ibom as a community leader. I sabi the work. The only problem come be that, I had totally forgotten my fear of needle. When it was my turn, I begged the nurses, including the ugly man, to hold me.
They started laughing. They say, “Oya, call Sanwo-Olu to hold you, call Buhari. Yeye troublemaker that is fearing needle. Nurse, oya, nack am.” I start to beg. I say she should be gentle with me. I start to apologise that they should hold me. I ran around the hall, and that man jumped at me, wrestled me to the ground and made sure they jabbed me. I screamed and started crying. The mumu people I was fighting for join their oppressors to laugh at me. They laughed at me o. The pain was massive, and my hand paralysed. I cry to my car and immediately slept off. Mbok, if this thing no work with all this pain, it will be sad o.
