Ayade and His Professorial Inanity 

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Ben Ayade

Cross River State Governor, Professor Ben Ayade, savoured uncommon popularity in the week, shortly after presenting his 2020 appropriation bill titled “Budget of Olimpotic Meristemasis”. He trended massively. Even though he too almost found it difficult pronouncing the grammatical jargons he put together, he had become a butt of jokes across the country and beyond.

Curiously, from 2016, when he started to present his own budget after assuming office in 2015, he had failed to clearly communicate his fiscal ideas to his people, in a sense that showed that he was a serious governor or that his government was people-focused. He seemed to enjoy the distractions more.

Otherwise how does anyone explain the fact that in 2016, his budget was titled, ‘Budget of Deep Vision’; in 2017, he called it ‘Budget of Infinite Transportation’; in 2018, he chose ‘Budget of Kinetic Crystalisation’; the 2019 was named ‘Budget of Quabalistic Densification’ before berthing recently at the ‘olimpotic meristemasis’ shores for the 2020 fiscal year.

All of these continue to sound like ideas from a child in a adult’s body, who had no clue what he was saying himself but was bent on impressing a people, who cared less about his professorial inanity. It’s time for Governor Ayade to grow up and start thinking as well as acting like a governor. His budget plans are not always only empty and unrealistic, but deceitfully designed.

But, wait a minute, who did he think he was addressing using those highfalutin but meaningless words? Believe it or not, this fellow with a rather brief height has a complex challenge. It is evident. He has impressed no one but himself.