BusyBody EFCC Will Soon Represent Nigeria at the World Cup

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With Reno Omokri

The news appeared so ridiculous that I was tempted to check my calendar to see if it was April Fools Day. It was not. Well, good a thing it was that I knew the journalist whose name was attached to the story. So, I decided to give him a call.

‘Leye, is it true that the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission has said it go after unqualified graduates attempting to undergo the mandatory National Youth Service Corps scheme’? I asked.

‘Senior, na so we see am o! Strange things are occurring in Nigeria.’ he responded.
And then I thought about it some more. Is this why former President Olusegun Obasanjo set up the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission? To be going after graduates to see who is qualified and who is not?

After thinking about it, I decided to play along. I went to the EFCC’s website to look for their hotlines. You may ask what I needed it for.
Well, I since read that EFCC is going after unqualified graduates doing their National Youth Service, I said to myself, Reno, why not be be a whistleblower and give EFCC a tip?

After all, there is an UNQUALIFIED Secondary School GRADUATE who is doing his NATIONAL SERVICE in Aso Rock. His name is General Buhari. Those UNQUALIFIED NYSC GRADUATES learnt their trade from General Buhari.

He who comes to EQUITY must come with CLEAN HANDS. EFCC should show us General Buhari’s CERTIFICATE before going after lesser offenders. JOBLESS EFCC.
I don’t know when being an UNQUALIFIED GRADUATE became a FINANCIAL CRIME. Next thing we will hear is that EFCC wants to represent Nigeria in the World Cup.
What silliness!

Having cash in excess of N5 million is against the Money Laundering Act, 2011. Yet, the EFCC has refused to investigate Bola Tinubu after bullion vans were filmed going onto his house. But they have time for UNQUALIFIED GRADUATES. Busybody EFCC!

Since the EFCC is so JOBLESS that they have to go after unqualified graduates, perhaps it is time for FIFA and CAF to engage them as consultants to help fish out overaged players. They left Goje’s N25 billion fraud to chase after NYSC. AIMLESSNESS of the highest order.
This latest misadventure by the EFCC only proves that General Buhari’s focus is on arresting people. That is why the EFCC is on an arresting spree. But prevention is better than cure. The other day, General Buhari declared open the EFCC’s N24 billion headquarters.

If General Buhari funds EDUCATION and YOUTH DEVELOPMENT the way he funds EFCC, crime will reduce drastically. Which Nigerian public university has seen N24 billion since General Buhari rose to power? None. Nada. Fund education like you fund EFCC and it will be poverty you will be arresting.

It is just so sad that this is what Nigeria has been reduced to under General Buhari. So sad. We have become a police state. Wealth has been criminalised. Almost unlimited powers have been given to the EFCC to wreak havoc on Nigeria and Nigerians. Is it any wonder that we are now the world headquarters for extreme poverty as a result?

Recently, we read that soldiers guarding a VIP stole his billions and deserted from the Nigerian Army. Who is this VIP? What is the source of his billions stolen by soldiers? Why were the soldiers CRIMINALISED and the VIP’s identity CLASSIFIED? What is the VIP’s relationship with General Buhari?
These are the sorts of things that the EFCC ought to concern itself with. Not unqualified graduates!

Nigeria does not have enough soldiers to fight terrorists, but we have enough to guard a VIP’s suspicious billions? And yet the All Progressives Congress wants Oyo State Governor, Seyi Makinde, to account for how he made the money he made while he was in the private sector.

Instead of the APC harassing Governor Seyi Makinde, perhaps they could help us get the EFCC to answer these questions I have raised with regards to the unknown VIP and his billions of equally unknown origins. Or is General Buhari no longer fighting corruption again?