The current spate of reported cases of child sexual abuse has motivated the author of family life-related publications and life coach, Bisi Adewale to launch a new book titled, “Protecting Your Children From Sexual Abuse.” Yinka Olatunbosun writes
From generation to generation, sex has been regarded as a taboo subject for many parents to discuss with children. While some children may have learnt about sexual intercourse and reproductory life through science classes, science textbooks are not designed to educate children on the dangerous trend of sexual abuse.
In his research, Bisi Adewale discovered through a survey conducted that 77per cent of the persons interviewed were never taught by parents about sex. This fact was corroborated by Mrs Yomi Adewale who said: “A lot of parents don’t know what to say to children on sexual education.”
In this new literary effort titled, “Protecting Your Children From Sexual Abuse”, Adewale recounts 51 heart-rending stories of child sexual abuse, some already reported in the media while others were learnt during counselling for couples and others in relationships. For the author, sex reports involving underage children have escalated to a very alarming stage which necessitated his writing the book.
During a press briefing on the book held recently in Ikeja, Lagos, the author expressed his concern on the rise of sexual abuse among underage children.
“I got provoked to finally write this book after someone sent a video of little school children performing oral sex for each other in their school compound. It was really disgusting. I knew I had to do something right away, having delayed for years,” he explained.
While navigating the subject matter of sexual predators and paedophiles, he insisted that many children are molested by people who appear to have genuine interest in them. It could be relatives, domestic staff or even school teachers. What makes it worse for the victims of sexual abuse is that the culprits never face the wrath of the law because more often than not, cases are not reported. And when they are, the Nigeria Police have challenges with prosecuting the accused diligently. One of such challenges is the parents’ interference who may prefer to settle out of court.
Still, stories around this societal menace have soured in recent times. From a child being molested by a sibling to another being molested by a courier man, the moral decadence is on a slide.
Even the religious institutions are not spared in this anomaly. As a matter of fact, many who pledged celibacy are actively sexually involved with others within the convent- a supposed spiritual sanctuary. Many of the victims of sexual abuse have discovered that the experience is a life-time torture. Some victims have developed an insatiable appetite for sex or strange sexual behaviours.
The author identified the popularity of pornography to the spread of sexual abuses. In one of the reported stories in the book, a six-year old female pupil in a private school in Amuwo Odofin, Lagos was serially defiled by two teachers in the school. They both showed pornography on their laptop to the pupil during extra mural lessons and made her practice same on them. The little girl began to perform oral sex on her brother and that was how she was discovered by her mother and the sexual history was traced to the school teachers.
In another account, a woman discovered two months after her marriage that her husband was gay. He was introduced to homosexuality at age four by the houseboy and later got involved with the extra lesson teacher as well.
Adewale also highlighted in the book some of the tactics used by abusers to lure young children. “The sexual offender may engage the child in sexual acts through threats, violence, bribes, force, friendship, flattery, gifts, fake love, help, closeness, sympathy, empathy, intimidation, misrepresentation and other forms of coercion,” he pointed out.
Adewale said the book is not created to cause distrust in family and other settings, but to create awareness about the destructive nature of child sexual abuse.
The official launch of the book is on Sunday, March 31 on the occasion of the Lagos Parenting Summit which holds at The Real Place, Ikeja, Lagos.