Loud Whispers With Joseph Edgar

What An Energetic Start for Mustapha Abdullahi 

We have seen reports that he has just been picked up by the EFCC after a petition filed by a CSO alleging that he had laundered about N500bn using five different companies owned by the same directors, and reportedly opened all within the same week in the past year.

You see, the man is down and is yet to defend himself, but one can look at the issues the matter has thrown up – next generation thieves, impunity in the system, lack of personal accountability in public office and, much more importantly, societal pressure on public office holders which drives them to this kind of things.

This person, from his pictures and a cursory look at his profile, is a young man. A very young man compared to the Methuselahs leading us. Some of us have been pushing for a natural selection to cull all the ogas that have refused to leave power even though they have crossed the 100-year-old mark, hoping that the next generation, imbued with a better grasp of humanity, buoyed by technology, will do things differently. So, you can imagine the dump in my heart when I saw this report of a young leader mired in corrupt practices.

This one was just recently appointed, and see what quagmire he has found himself in. Mbok, don’t let me talk too much until he comes out and tells us his side.

But for now, and from what we are seeing of the new generation, na corruption pro max. If we are not careful, the upcoming ones will eat us dry the way very hungry people devour fish, not sparing the bones or the eyes. We are truly in trouble. Kai.

Desmond Elliot’s Broken Ring

After my write-up last week, one of his strong supporters, who is also a friend, convened a meeting in a secret location in Ikoyi. I went there on an empty stomach, expecting that the bearded supporter would at least give me breakfast. Nothing oo, my people. I don’t know which kind of luck I have carried and entered politics. Others go to meetings and come out with bags of rice and wads of naira. I will go to the meeting, and afterwards, I will be rushing to the buka to eat afang.

Well, Desmond looked a bit tired with sleep bags underneath his eyes. Apparently, he had not been sleeping and had just come down from the mountain. All he has now is God, and he kept saying that, “Na God get all the power.”

The structure has moved against him, his godfather is resilient, and all seems to be against him. At some point, he was close to tears: “Duke, na God hand I dey,” and I replied, “God dey with you.

When the Philistines amass against one tiny Desmond, it is only up to an invisible force you can raise your eyes to. How will “little” Desmond stand the full wrath of Gbaja, how oo?

Kai, the governor has washed his hands, the GAC people have washed their hands, the party people in Surulere have washed their hands. Number one is ambivalent; his son is vexing with Desmond.  The First Lady is having a siesta. Who is standing with Desmond? Only me, this bearded sponsor wey no give me food and the people.

Yes, Desmond is wildly popular in Surulere. I have seen clips of the people shouting his name at his opponent’s rally, but then, since when did the people matter in APC matters? This time, the people will matter, I swear.

Hope Uzodimma: An Unforgettable Snub

His Excellency Governor Hope Uzodinma is in the news today. We seem to be hearing all sorts of things from every corner about him.

I just read something very brilliant, purportedly said by Nyesom Wike who also seems to be calming down these days He was reportedly quoted to have said – “Oh! You want to come and settle conflict in another man’s state but you also want to be senator from your state in 2027 when your term as governor will be expiring in 2028.”

My eyes popped. Oh my God! I jumped up from my bowl of afang. How is that going to be possible?

Senator and Governor at the same time? That would be very funny and historic.

As if that was not enough, different stories of campaign funds, fights within the Progressive Governors’ Forum and a brief mention in the matter of the arrest of the Energy Commission boss and you come to the realisation that we are looking at probably the busiest and the most powerful ‘Igbo’ governor in recent times.

So it was under these clouds, that I saw him walk into the dining area of the beautiful Eko Hotel with a retinue of men the other day.

It was like a huge mafia Don in those American movies, and everybody gave way and nobody dared to even greet him. I then looked at my son, Alvin and said – see, that is Imo State Governor and he said – hmmmmm.

You know these Gen Z people, he could not care less if he was a walking plate of plasticine

I continued. He is a very powerful man, he wants to be senator and governor at the same time and wait come let’s go and greet him and take a picture.

I should have just minded my business ooo. Shey, I thought I was dealing with a Sanwo-Olu or Dapo, the Eleyi of Ijebu East.

This was Hope o. I walked very proudly and confidently to him and said: “Your Excellency”.

His boys, or should I say men looked at me in amazement. Exactly how those people in American mafia films look when a stranger breaks their cordon that last minute before they rush you with slaps and kicks.

I swear, they actually looked at their principal seeking permission and he ignored them and looked up at me and gave me a verbal slap: “What is it, you can see that I am about to eat breakfast please excuse me.”

At that moment, I laid a huge curse on that jobless oaf who invented the term – public servant.

This one was far from a public servant o. This one was a public overlord and I apologised and walked away in shame and sadness for getting that kind of embarrassment in front of my son.

Anyways, I just felt like giving you guys the gist as this man’s name keeps flying all over the news so that when he finally becomes the very first Governor/Senator Hope, you will all know that he once snubbed me on his way to making history.

Someone once said, “We get the leaders we deserve. Mbok, we truly do deserve this one. Kai!

A Positive Strike from Gov Ademola Adeleke

This Oba committed a major crime against humanity. While the world was reeling with COVID, this otherwise respectable traditional ruler was busy creaming out funds that were meant to ameliorate sufferings and even save lives. He was convicted and jailed, and somehow, we forgot to dethrone him.

Anyways, better late than never. A report emanating from Osun shows that the Dancing Governor has finally done the needful. He has been dethroned by the state government and rightly so.

See ehn, these little ones that do not have that kind of connection that makes most of them untouchable, we should be using them for the optics abi? Shebi we cannot touch the babas, but these petty criminals, we use them and shout it so that the bulk of the people will see it as a deterrent and begin to respect themselves. With time, you will see that the frustration of the petty thief who is jailed and harassed will instill fear in those who want to tow that path, and gradually, we will wipe out the tiny cabal that continues to “deal” with us.

Well done, Your Excellency. Whatever finally gave you that nudge, greet it for me, the thing tried. Good riddance.

Seriake Dickson: A Different Kind of Kingmaker

This baba, who is built like a wrestler, has more sense than Peter Obi. Before I tell you why, let me ask you guys if you have ever heard of that wrestler they used to call Maliamugu, the Ugandan giant? That is who Dickson reminds me of.

Unlike Peter Obi and the rest, who do not have political foresight and rushed into ADC only to run out again, Seriake went quietly to form the NDC because he knew exactly that Atiku would never agree, thereby positioning himself for the inevitable fallout.

Seriake was perfectly positioned, and Obi and Kwankwaso and their hordes rushed to him, propelling him from a regional fisherman politician to a national one with a prominent national party. NDC now stands in a very strong position to give APC some sleepless nights.

I know that APC is not sleeping and will do its usual stuff, which I will not say here. You know APC believes that we all have fufu in our brains, and that is why they do some of these things. Well, it is not their fault; it is the fufu that is in the brains of our politicians that allows them to do these things and get away with them.

Well, barring any fufu-inspired moves, an Obi/ Kwankwaso ticket would energise the system, throw in the much-needed electricity and bring out the best in President Tinubu’s campaign skills. So, Nigerians prepare for more Emilokan-type of rhetoric and more bala blue slogans. Exciting days ahead.

Muhammad Buba: A 30-Year-Old Miracle

The clip has gone viral, followed by so many photos of this young man with President Bola Tinubu and many more top political heavyweights circulating.

At the risk of body shaming or crossing some lines which I don’t know, I will risk describing what I saw and have been seeing. It was a clip of him submitting his papers to the APC verification officers. He is vying for a seat in the House of Representatives from Kaduna State.

The officials were amazed and rightly so. He says he is 30 years old and looks nothing older than six, but his brain capacity and self-elocution are those of an older person, which confirms his assertion that he is 30 years old.

Don’t let me talk too much because attempting to engage on his physicality may touch on some sensitive chords, but then again, it is very difficult to tell this story without attempting to ask questions about his physicality.

Mbok, let me just talk about the thing that has been scratching my throat and hope I don’t get into trouble. Please, is this a child or a dwarf looking like a child? Because I don’t understand again. Is this like a comic relief to lighten the tension, or is he truly a dwarf? I would like to state that there is nothing wrong with dwarfism.

I am waiting for answers o. Kai.

Opay: Charity Begins at Home

This Fintech owned by some Chinese people just snuck into the country, and before you knew it, it has amazed over 40 million users in Nigeria with about 10 million daily users. This is power. Not only this, it has spread its tentacles to logistics, food delivery, and transport, among others.

This is a unique success abi? Yes, but there is a small issue. They have decided to list themselves on another Exchange out of the country, and this is not sitting well with the Nigerian capital market community, especially local investors who would have really loved to be part of the magic.

I agree with them because with over 40 million Nigerians throwing in significantly to their revenues and bottom line, we should be in pole position to reap the benefits thereof, as my brother Ajanaku, who used to work with them, would say – that one likes to speak in biblical terms:  thereof, therein, kai.

The issue here is that although an entrepreneur has the right to chase favourable conditions that would help his business, pushing towards a foreign listing when we have the most viable exchange with the greatest returns in the world can only begin to look one kind. So my prayers to them are for them to at least consider a joint listing if for nothing else. Na beg ooo.

Yemi and Temi Edun: A Walk Through a Stroke

Yemi is very popular and well-liked within a specific spectrum of the financial circles in both Nigeria and the UK. He is everybody’s friend. People will be boasting and saying – I am Yemi’s friend and have known him for years and Yemi too will be saying, “Edgar, I know almost everybody, you know.” And guys, I know people.

Well, Temi, his wife, got hit by a stroke one evening like that, and she almost lost her life. I think the issue started when she went to give birth and developed high blood pressure. The stroke hit her and almost took her life, but thankfully, with great care, she bounced back and is on the super highway to recovery.

See, blood pressure issues are our lot as Nigerians. From the age of 40, three out of five will start having BP problems, and because it does not come with symptoms, it will just take you unawares, and you will die. That is how we will be hearing that the man just slumped.

Temi wrote a beautiful book about her experiences and also mentioned in detail Yemi’s courage in standing by her. I will be having a session with them at the Mövenpick Hotel in Ikoyi, with over 100 people in attendance, to discuss this issue.

By the time you are reading this piece, the session will have been held. Don’t worry, I will gist you guys next week. Buy paper, don’t do free reader or go online. Buy the damn paper. Thanks.

Alex Ekubo: Silence in Death

This talented actor was reported to have lost his life during the week. Reports have said it was cancer. He was only 40 and a leading light in the industry. What enamoured him to me was his antics with his brothers – Ike Ogbonna and Yomi Makun. Together, they called themselves the Chop Life Gang. Their actions caused so much laughter and admiration as they were well-dressed, well-groomed and very good-looking young men who lightened up every event with their entrance.

This was a great loss not only to Nollywood but to the nation, and I pray that God will give his family and very close friends the solitude to handle the painful loss. Rest in peace, bro.