Loud Whispers with JOSEPH EDGAR

Babajide Sanwo-Olu and the Haunted Museum

I want to yab Sanwo today. Everybody knows that I simply adore the man but “he no try” this time. So, the Lagos State Government delivers a world class Museum at Onikan. The museum is rated globally as top five. It is the cynosure of all eyes and digitally engaged and then hands it over to an “Imp” to run.

What exactly is the matter with our leaders and the system? A museum with such technical importance and you hand it over to someone whose only qualification according to the person himself is “I have been dancing since I was 13.”

This person quickly sets up a canteen at the place, hands it over to his wife and starts running the place like a beer parlour in Shomolu.

As expected and according to him,  “10,000 people have visited since I took over” and I am screaming in my toilet. Secondary schools in Shomolu deliver much more than that on their inter house sports day, talk less of an edifice like this museum that cost taxpayers millions of dollars to deliver.

Furthermore, all sort of stories have come out. I have personally seen an invoice with private accounts used to collect funds on the museum. This and other shady things would definitely lead to the death of this masterpiece.

Mark my words, at this level, that dream will not last five years and it will end up a relic and a white elephant project unless this “Imp” and a dancer is kicked out and better qualified people are put in place.

If Mr. Governor is confused as to how to go about getting technical leadership for the place, he can hand it over to the Department of Archeology of any of our universities or go into a partnership with the British Museum who already has a more than passing interest in the place rather than sit down and watch it turn to another ‘man must wack joint.’ My two pence.

Omoyele Sowore: What Manner of Freedom?

Everybody around has begged me not to comment on this matter. They said: “Edgar na ‘Illegal IG’ Sowore talk o, see where he dey o. You know say Sowore get death wish, you too like Afang, how will you cope if they come for you?”

But the more I think about it, the more the thing “dey fear me.”

At what point can we now say that freedom of speech is guaranteed in this country. The more I follow this Sowore’s latest matter, the more confused and fearful that I get. It is looking like the authorities are hiding under this cyber-stalking law to curb freedom of speech.

Yes, even though this Sowore in my books is an irritant and one prone to seek for attention, this particular one is looking one kind in my eye.

May I remind authorities that we are in a democracy and as such freedom of speech is guaranteed being the bedrock of democracy. Yabing a government official or calling him illegal should not be enough for this one we are seeing o.

There are a thousand and more ways to silence people like Sowore without this one that continues to give him some kind of relevance.

Mbok, wetin dey there if they call me illegal. Anybody that call me illegal, shebi I will either show him that I am not illegal or I basically just ignore and continue my work.

Please, all these are not right abeg. It’s fearful and really throwing up concerns for basic rights in the system. Thanks.

The Nyesom Wike I Saw

Shebi they did not want to send me invitation to the biggest event of the new year. Thankfully, I got one and found myself in the elegant hall at the Eko Hotel in Lagos.

Well, me I came for two things – to see if I can hug Diana Ross and to also look very closely at Mr. Wike who whether we like it or not is the issue in this our Nigeria today.

They refused me to go near Diana. All I did came to naught. I begged, persuaded and even shouted the usual Nigerian mantra of – do you know who I am? All no work, so I went back to my table to sit by which that time, Mudi had already finished all the small chops on our table.

Anyways, it was time for Mr. Wike to win his award. Before him everybody that won the award came out alone or with a few of their staff members to collect their awards. But when it came to his turn, the man emptied the National Assembly, all the states in the south, all staff of FCT, APC and PDP members, his village elders, church members and all what not, joined him on stage.

When they all finished climbing the stage, it looked like a church miracle convention.

Wike is a man of character, a man that loves the spotlight, a man that loves to be at the centre of attention and this was his night. He spoke in his usual voice, thanked THISDAY chairman and those who voted for him and walked away with his 1000-man squad who came all the way from – only God knows where – to support him.

Immediately he sat down, I went as close as possible to just stare at him as people all came to hug and congratulate him for the awards. His wife was very quiet beside him and mostly didn’t utter a word. As I watched, I contemplated walking up to him but changed my mind before the man pour spit on my fine face. Kai, Nigeria has really produced this one. This na what in Shomolu we used to call Character. Real character. Kai.

Mojisola Meranda vs Mubasiru Obasa:  a Clownish Distraction

Did you guys see the footage of members of the Lagos State House of Assembly ushering in their new speaker into her office with songs, dance and prayers.

After watching the footage, the first thing that came to my mind was: Are these the ones that are expected to provide oversight for the executive arm of government?

They didn’t look like people who understood the meaning of the word ‘separation” talk less of “power” as they sang like raucous football fans after an unexpected win.

Well, Nigerians have been unwittingly dragged into a comedy of errors at the Lagos State House of Assembly. The erstwhile sit-tight leader was clinically removed while lounging in the US. A new leader was immediately sworn in and the highest serving body of their party, the GAC, sanctioned and even ran to Abuja to seek presidential endorsement.

Ousted leader comes back and tries to see “oga” and starts puffing smoke- it was a fake mace, they didn’t take their baths and as such I am still leader.

The other group says “don’t try it, we don’t want you again. When you were using N17billion to erect one gate you did not know? Don’t come here.”

Now it appears that the die is cast. Obasa didn’t die o, it is looking like he is reemerging gradually. The GAC is said to be divided on the issue, rumours are rife that the President is not happy with his removal and this is looking true judging by Obasa’s boldness. Obanikoro is fighting Adefuye and confusion is everywhere.

All I will say at this juncture, is that the realisation that the members of that house really have no say in all of these just shows the “kurukereness” of our democracy. All these their secondary school children chants will just end one second once a signal comes from the top.

It is so bad, that even me can be named interim sole administrator of the house from the right source and they will all turn their backs on both Obasa and my fine lady and be singing the same song for me.

This for me is just a clownish distraction from more serious issues. Can the oga at the top just make his pronouncement make we all rest abeg? This is tiring already. Thanks

Muhammadu Buhari: Marines at the Door

This is the kind of tale they used to say go and tell it to the Marines. It is the aje butter people that used to say that one but Shomolu people will just raise their nose in the air and say “hmmmm fabu.”

Kai, why Oga even bothers with these tales by moonlight beats me. Who even cares to know how he survives or eats, talk less to telling us that he now survives on the rent from his two houses?

Thankfully, my brother Odinkalu has put him in a well-deserved place by asking him to “stop lying”

Mbok, the story is tired. He had used the story to win election twice and did all that while in government and is now in a well-deserved retirement and he is still telling us about his incorruptibility.

Mbok, who has his poverty helped? Did it give us good governance when he was in power, did it stop corruption when he was in power, did it better the economy or did it stop snakes in government parastatals from stealing money?

Abeg, this has been the luckiest Nigerian alive going through all of those powerful positions and how did he pay us back? Na “I’m not aware” we got from all the trust and confidence we reposed on him

Ma abasi, this Baba should not let me go at him o. He should just leave us be abeg so that we can respect him, if for nothing else for his age and the position he last held.

Two house ko, two boys quarter na him we for hear sef.

Davidson Iriekpen and Shaka Momodu: Two Peas in a Pod

Please my dear Editor allow me serenade both of you today. I owe whatever little achievement that I may have achieved in media to the both of you hence this little honour.

As I walked into the THISDAY Awards show, it was straight into the arms of these very brilliant gentlemen. Both of them, I have worked under as editors of this paper.

I at first did not recognise Shaka, he had grown beards and I thought Ojukwu had woken up. I grabbed Mudi’s hands and screamed -Ojukwuooooo and that one said no be Ojukwu na Shaka. I hugged him. Shaka was my first editor, he used to frown a lot and be doing as if he is vexing but a kinder man I have not seen. If my page was late, he will call me and warn me “I will cancel your page, you don’t know it’s a privilege for you to be writing for THISDAY.” Because that time, I did not know him and I will be begging. It was Azuka that later told me  “na shakara, Shaka no fit hurt a fly.”

Davidson on the other hand is a marvel. Extremely brilliant and passionate. I first no like am because upon resumption, he summoned me to a meeting in Apapa. Mbok who summons the Duke of Shomolu, but he did. Since then, we have built a solid relationship based on mutual respect.

Davidson would call intermittently- Edgar, the typo is too much on your page, I go reduce your page to one.

 I will beg and when he drops, I will smirk under my breath- I will just release his nudes. He continues to guide me on the ethics of journalism: “Edgar, this is a serious paper and you cannot say ‘yansh.’ Edgar your page ehnn, I dey take my time to read am make you no put me for trouble.” And when the Afe Babalola letter came, he was the one who called and said “Oya dey go Ekiti make dem help me beat you small.”

Seeing these two supremely talented individuals that night standing close to the food stall – Eko Hotel food dey quick finish, I could not help but hug them and bow my head in appreciation of two very brilliant and powerful newspaper Editors. Well-done guys, Afang any time.

Samuel Ogbuku: Waiting for Godot

One thing about the media, is its corrective powers if handled responsibly. Last week, I wrote a piece on this gentleman who is the Managing Director of the NDDC on the back of their 25th anniversary.

In the piece, I expressed my reservations on its positioning vis-a-via its mandate in the region and prayed that Ogbuku who is at the helm of affairs would do much better than his predecessors judging by his pedigree.

As expected, I got a lot of feedback on that piece. It’s like every Ijaw man, every Ibibio man and every Warri man had something to say. My phones did not stop ringing and I heard all sorts.

I also got a call from his people and they promised to get back to me on some of his achievements and his plans but as at the time of writing, I have heard or seen nothing.

Let me state clearly, I have no vested interest beyond the fact that as an Akwa Ibom man, I am a stakeholder. The interventionist institution must intervene in the region and move away from its immediate past of incestuous expenditures which have no bearing to the people of the region.

I do not know Mr Ogbuku and as such do not have anything against him and “he no do me anything.” In fact, I have even heard that he has “tried much more than the others” which is a good thing to hear about a public figure.

But let us see more, let us feel NDDC more, let’s see the milestones on the roads proclaiming this project is NDDC project, let’s see plaques on schools saying this was built by NDDC, let’s see plaques on hospitals and more.

That is my take, I no vex, I no yab anybody; all of us na Niger Delta, let’s develop it. Thanks.

Tiwa Savage: A Swan Song Too Late

I just saw a report attached to this super beautiful diva. The report quoted her as saying that she regrets leaving her husband for another man who eventually did not marry her.

Well I’d rather not say anything because, I do not know if the report is true. But the report has thrown up an issue that I would like to address and which is that of conviction.

A lot of us do not act with conviction, we allow societal pressure push us to taking decisions that will affect us.

The moment we have conviction and we move, I assure you there would be no regret.

So, if for example it was conviction that made her leave her hubby, no matter the disappointment on the other side there would be no regrets. But if it was pressure, material things, then it is this swan song that we will be hearing all the way.

We should all learn to do things, take decisions and the rest based on conviction. So, my dear Tiwa, I am moving towards you by conviction. Please tell your husband to wait a little bit more, if he had waited all these years since you left him, he can wait for another six months. Let’s see where my conviction will lead us.