Celebrated humour merchant, Biodun Olapade, popularly known as MC Abbey, took to the stage recently to discuss something more than comedy, establishing a completely different dimension to his business of making people happy. He opted to talk about relationship during a concert tagged, ‘One Night Stand with MC Abbey: Love, Relationship and Sex’, during which he spoke with Mary Ekah on why he chose to take such a serious conversation to the comedy stage, how he has sustained his marriage of 10 years without much rancour, reason for celebrities’ marriage crises and many more
One Night Stand with MC Abey: Love, Relationship and Sex, What is it all about?
Practically, it is a platform for me to reach out to couples and matured singles to deal with issues that are around these topics because I know that there are lots of relationships that are having issues around these topics which many do not feel comfortable talking about. Some need a platform to express them, while some are just confused and some homes are broken because of this.
There are a whole lot issues that happen when it comes to relationships and since I am happily married and my job practically is to see couples happy and also to see relationships work, I felt that I could use this platform to reach out to them and deal with those issues that revolve around love, sex and relationship. And of course, the comical side of me will come out because I am going to crack all my jokes around these issues. We want to go all out, say it as it is and deal with the issues properly.
Marriage, love, sex and relationship are really serious issues. Do you think this is the right platform to deal with them?
Well, people want to say serious things on a lighter note. Sometimes, serious things are not always conducive to be said on a serious atmosphere and that is why some times, if you have serious issues, they would tell you to go for vacation, picnic, travel, go for retreat and deal with the issues because you need that kind of atmosphere to deal with serious issues. So using this as platform to do that, I think and I know that it would go a long way to solve those issues because while I’m comical, I would also be making sense to some people having serious issues in their relationships and marriages. So I think it is a beautiful platform to deal with that. And again whatever gift you have is a platform you can use to spread any good message.
How long have you been married?
My marriage will be 10 this year.
Taking a look at the entertainment industry, there are lots of broken marriages, so is it that you are trying to speak to your colleagues?
Yes, I am trying to speak to my colleagues and also speak to the ones that are not yet in that struggle and practically to bring some correctness to all these. If you ask yourself, what is the bedrock of your union, you world find that a lot of my colleagues have the wrong foundation to their marriages, they have wrong reasons why that are married – they have wrong perception of what marriage should be and they got into it with the wrong perception and to them if they get in there and it is not working, they can go through the back door. You know like they have always said, ‘For better for stay, for worse for go’. Of course, there would be issues in marriages, it is a vicissitude – ups and downs but some people are not prepared to build the down side of it, so when it happens, they feel they have alternatives. I feel that as long as it is not abuse, there is no need for that. I will always tell people that they should make God the foundation of their marriages. So if it is not God, you would have problems but if it is God that joined you together, then you know that you can still cry back to Him. Marriage is an institution that established by God, so He alone knows how to make it work.
You sound so spiritual, is it MC Abbey taking to the podium and leaving comedy?
No, I can’t leave comedy! I am sounding spiritual here because I am a spiritual being, so it is part of me. I have always been on the podium preaching the gospel one way or the other. So it is not really strange to me. But that is not really the focus, but I can’t separate that from me. But I am not leaving comedy nor leaving the podium, they are both in me. I am a multitalented person. The comical aspect is in me but if I start to preach to you now, you would be shocked. I can really preach. I have pioneered a lot of fellowships many years back in my university days; I have pastored churches, so it is not strange to me to be spiritual but a lot of people do not know that aspect of me. So when I start going deep into scriptures and godly foundation, people are like wow how can a comedian know so much about the scriptures. They don’t just know that it is not on the surface but that I am a deep person.
Ten years into your marriage, what would you say have been the challenges for you and what is responsible for celebrity marriage crash?
Personally, my challenge has been the fact that I have to balance my work and home responsibilities, and I thank God for a wonderful wife that I have, who understands me perfectly well. Now, the onus falls on me to put a balance between my wife and my kids. I have to be a husband to my wife and then a father to my children, and also at the same time, my fans are demanding for my attention too, I have to reach out to my fans, I have to push the brand, I have to smile for everybody even for those that I do not like. I just have to keep smiling just to satisfy my fans and sometimes it comes on the platform of sacrifice. But the wise thing to do is to know where to draw the line, which by God’s grace I have been able to manage that. I don’t allow anything to affect spending quality time with my family as often as possible. In every month, I have a particular time designated for my wife and I, then another time designated for my wife, children and I. And nothing, no matter the amount they want to pay me, will take that time away from me. And that is a principle I have built over time, which has continued to sustain my marriage.
What is your advice to married colleagues in the entrainment industry?
I want to say to them that first of all, you must understand the bedrock of your marriage. If it is God, then go back to God and let Him fix it for you. And then you have to understand you must not be passive in your marriage. You cannot fold your hands and allow things to happen, you have to be involved. It is like an empty basket and what you put into the basket is what you would take out, so if you don’t invest in your marriage, you cannot get the best from it – consciously invest time, love, joy, happiness and many other good things in your marriage and for the men, respect the woman in your life.
Don’t treat her like a piece of furniture. And for the women too, respect and honour your husband and learn to be submissive to the man in your life. And if there are things you cannot sort out between the two of you, go on your knees and pray to God about them and if you find yourself on that crossroad and you are frustrated, talk to a counselor about it. Just do everything within your power to ensure that your marriage works because marriage or a relationship cannot work until you make it work. And you have to make it work!