Being introverted is no barrier to building meaningful connections, writes LINUS OKORIE
Networking is the key to cultivating career and business growth. As important as this is, these activities can be daunting for introverts because they require more cognitive effort. The thought of engaging in small talk, approaching strangers, and putting oneself out there in social settings can trigger feelings of anxiety and discomfort. This is why introverts don’t like attending events, especially without prior information. But contrary to popular belief, being introverted does not have to be a barrier to building meaningful connections.
Dear introverts, you can be great at networking—just as in sales, law, or anything. It’s crucial to understand that shyness and introversion are not synonymous. While shyness involves a fear of negative evaluation, introversion simply reflects a preference for solitude and reflection. Introverts often thrive in solitary environments, drawing strength from introspection and deep thought. In his insightful observations, Simon Sinek reminds us that confidence does not stem from extroversion alone; rather, it emanates from passion and dedication. As introverts, our quieter demeanour should not be misconstrued as a lack of confidence or capability. Instead, we can harness our innate qualities to navigate networking opportunities with authenticity and purpose.
To effectively navigate networking as an introvert, it’s essential to adopt a mindset of self-awareness and self-acceptance. Recognize and embrace your introverted nature as a source of strength rather than a limitation. Understand that meaningful connections can be forged through genuine engagement and thoughtful conversation, rather than superficial interactions.
Embrace Your Introversion. The first step to successful networking as an introvert is to embrace your introversion. Understand that being introverted doesn’t mean being shy or anti-social; it simply means that you gain energy from solitary activities and may feel drained after prolonged social interactions. Accepting and embracing your introverted nature will help you approach networking with confidence and authenticity. With this self-awareness and acceptance, you can embrace networking in your own way.
Set Clear Goals. Before attending any networking event, take some time to clarify your goals. What do you hope to achieve? This will help you focus your efforts and avoid wasting time and energy on irrelevant or unproductive conversations. For example, you may want to network to find a mentor, learn a new skill, explore a career opportunity, or build a relationship with a specific person or organization. Having a specific goal will also help you prepare your introduction, questions, and follow-up actions. This can help alleviate some of the anxiety associated with networking and provide a focus for your interactions.
Plan ahead . One of the best ways to overcome the anxiety and stress that introverts often feel when networking is to plan as much as possible. This means doing some research on the event, the attendees, the speakers, and the topics that will be discussed. You can also prepare some icebreakers, stories, and questions that you can use to start and maintain conversations. Additionally, you can plan your attire to minimize any potential surprises or difficulties. Arthur Ashe once said that self-confidence is an important key to success and an important key to self-confidence is preparation.
Start Small. Networking doesn’t have to involve large, crowded events. Start small by reaching out to people in your existing circle – colleagues, classmates, or friends of friends. Coffee meetings, informational interviews, or casual gatherings with a few individuals can be less overwhelming for introverts and provide opportunities for meaningful connections. Additionally, choose quality over quantity. Our social media-driven society has trained us to value quantity over quality as we try to accumulate thousands of ‘connections.’ The most important part of networking is forming new relationships not just amassing new contacts. Knowing this as an introvert, focus on forging strong bonds with the small number of people you can network with. And that’s more than just okay. One meaningful relationship can change your life in a way that 1,000 casual acquaintances perhaps never will.
Listen and Ask Questions. One of the greatest strengths of introverts is their ability to listen attentively. Use this to your advantage during networking interactions. Instead of focusing on talking about yourself, actively listen to what others have to say. Ask open-ended questions that encourage the other person to share their experiences, insights, and perspectives. This not only demonstrates genuine interest but also helps establish rapport and build trust.
Leverage Online Platforms. For introverts who may feel more comfortable communicating behind a screen, online networking platforms can be invaluable. Social media platforms like LinkedIn offer opportunities to connect with professionals in your field, join industry-specific groups, and participate in virtual discussions. This allows introverts to network on their terms, at their own pace, without the pressure of face-to-face interactions.
Follow Up. Networking doesn’t end when the event is over. The most important part of networking is following up with the people you meet or contact. Follow up with the people you’ve met to nurture and maintain those connections. This means sending a thank-you note, feedback, a recommendation, or relevant resources that can add value to them. Send a personalized message expressing your appreciation for their time and insight. Share relevant articles or resources that may be of interest to them. Building relationships takes time and effort, so be proactive in staying connected and continuing the conversation.
Practice Self-Care. Finally, remember to prioritize self-care throughout the networking process. Networking can be draining for introverts, so it’s important to recharge and replenish your energy reserves. Schedule downtime after networking events to relax and unwind. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfilment, whether it’s reading, journaling, or spending time alone in nature. Taking care of your mental and emotional well-being will enable you to show up as your best self in networking situations.
Remember, networking is not about being the loudest voice in the room or making the most connections. It’s about building genuine relationships based on mutual respect and shared interests. This may require stepping out of your comfort zone, but it’s entirely possible with the right mindset and approach. So go ahead, embrace your introverted nature, play to your strengths, approach networking with confidence, and watch your network flourish.
Okorie MFR is a leadership development expert spanning 27 years in the research, teaching and coaching of leadership in Africa and across the world. He is the CEO of the GOTNI Leadership Centre
