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How They Catch Monkeys In Brazil

16 Jun 2012

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By Dele Momodu

“Beware of those who seek to take care of your need Lest your caretakers become your jailers”

-Jim Rohn, The Treasury of Quotes

Fellow Nigerians, if you grew up in my generation or much earlier, you are likely to have come across the novels of one of the best thriller writers of all times, James Hadley Chase. I was a voracious reader of his books and that of Ian Fleming, who authored the James Bond series, as well as the amazing works of Nick Carter, Harold Robbins, Sidney Sheldon, Mario Gianluigi Puzo, Robert Ludlum, James Clavell, James Michener, Joan Collins, Leslie Charteris, Denise Robbins, Barbara Cartland, Agatha Christie and other authors of romance and thrillers. The reason was very simple; James Hadley chase was easily the master of the game. He was fast-paced and extremely pleasurable to follow and digest. His characters were so vivid that you could almost walk into them in a crowd. His language was modern and lucid. And his plots covered every sphere of human endeavour. He had the incredible power of narration and description and took us on a tour de force of exotic locations and transported us effortlessly to places of our dreams.


One of his most powerful novels I read, and fell in love with, was The Paw in the Bottle. It was in this riveting novel I read how they catch monkeys in Brazil. I used to see monkeys at the then University of Ife, which was proudly renamed Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife, but I didn’t know how greedy an animal it was until I read the awesome description by James Hadley Chase, the British writer whose real name was Rene Brabazon Raymond, the son of a British Colonel. Please, enjoy his narrative:


“Have you ever heard how they catch monkeys in Brazil Julie?” Let me tell you. They put a nut in a bottle, and tie the bottle to a tree. The monkey grasps the nut, but the neck of the bottle is too narrow for the monkey to withdraw its paw and the nut. You would think the monkey would let go of the nut and escape, wouldn’t you? But it never does. It is so greedy it never releases the nut and is always captured. Remember that story, Julie. Greed is a dangerous thing. If you give way to it, sooner or later you will be caught.”


I don’t know if the fictional character, Julie, forgot that important warning, but I remembered it immediately the news broke out that our dear Brother, Honourable Farouk Lawan, a respected member of Nigeria’s House of Representatives had visited Femi Otedola, the effervescent Al Capone of the diesel cartel in Nigeria, and demanded $3million as bribe from him, and actually got a few instalments totalling about $620,000 in cash already.


The story was indeed stranger than fiction. Had Hon. Lawan read James Hadley Chase, he would probably have learnt how to be a wary transgressor. If Lawan had kept his ears to the ground, he would have understood the way the cookie crumbles. If Lawan truly believed and trusted Femi Otedola like the fox that he is, he would believe anything and later get the shock treatment. Possibly unknown to Lawan, Femi is not a man to monkey with because he is a first class student of the Machiavelli school of Life.


As someone who has followed and chronicled the lifestyle of the rich, famous, and the not-so-famous Africans for some time, I have known and studied Femi Otedola very closely for upwards of 22 years when I first noticed him at one of those gigs of the Afro-Juju rave, Sir Shina Peters. Even if he had little money at that time, he already portrayed the carriage, confidence and grace of a man who could feel and see a bright future ahead. His inner circle of friends knew him as an extremely loyal person if in love with you. But the caveat was always added that stepping on Femi’s toes was as good as touching the tiger by the tail. Femi is an extremist that knows no middle of the road in his dealings with people. For him, the opposite of love is enmity.  You could not borrow from him and expect to run away with it because you were friends. He had a clear principle on business and friendship and would never mix the two no matter how close you were.


It is always good to know people’s background for you to decipher how to handle or deal with them. Femi started making his cash as a money-lender. He was so good at it that he became legendary. As fate would have it, he had the heart of a gambler who took many risks, and fortune and fame beckoned at him. In one of his audacious moments, he had asked his dad to enter the gubernatorial race in Lagos state at a time the old man had no chance on earth of becoming Governor. At a stage Femi’s dad expressed exasperation at the burden Femi had placed on him because he had lost the little money he kept for the rainy day on what looked like a total misadventure. To make matters worse, most of Femi’s friends who could have supported the bid practically chickened out because by all accounts and permutations it was mission impossible. Femi would later tell his friends how one man stood out among his peers and supported them with some good money at the time. That man is the one and only Guru of telecoms, the Tsar of oil and gas, and the silent Power House, Dr Michael Adeniyi Agbolade Isola Adenuga.


Miraculously, Femi’s dad, Sir Michael Otedola stole victory from his cantankerous opponents who were at daggers-drawn with themselves and thus recorded a miraculous win. That development, and the contacts Femi later made, would change his life beyond belief. Femi took serious advantage of the opportunity and from there on one thing led to another. Femi seized the one in a lifetime chance, made money and grew himself into an octopus and major player in the Nigerian capital market. His company, Zenon became a near monopoly in a country totally dependent on diesel for most things. He would later acquire substantial shares in African Petroleum Plc. Femi also expanded into Chevron Texaco, Zenon Properties, F.O Transport and Atlas Shipping.


Femi loves to hold the four aces and keeps his joker in the pack. He enjoys the whiff of money and knows how to hit his competitors where it hurts. He would usually ask what’s better than money and try to authenticate the truism that there’s always a price tag on most people if not everyone. This, I believe, must have been the reason he took on the risky power-game of setting up and shooting down one of the brightest hopes of Nigeria, Hon. Farouk Lawan, and he has effortlessly succeeded in denting his image, at least pending the time we get his own side of the deal. The tragedy is not that Hon. Lawan fell like a pack of cards but that he walked into Femi’s sucker punch and got himself knocked out even before the tournament started.


No one would have expected Lawan to waltz himself into such a cheap scandal. The man who sought to arrest the tiger must never close his eyes in the zoo. It remains to be seen how he talked himself into this deadly trap and how Femi managed to hypnotise him to pick such amount of cash, personally, from a man under investigation. This must have been the height of greed and indiscretion. Without jumping to conclusions, Hon. Lawan’s tactical blunder has become a major source of revulsion and depression for those of us who genuinely believed in the crusade to stop the oil Mafia in their barefaced stealing of our commonwealth.


This saga has thus thrown up too many questions begging for answers from both parties. Let’s begin from the House of Representatives. In retrospect, what has ever come out from the cacophony of the committees probing this and that in the National Assembly? Is it not curious that there was so much hype and grandstanding about the Farouk Lawan’s Committee on the fuel subsidy scam while the Magnus Abe Committee in the Senate seemed to have melted into the Abuja Triangle because it probably understood the PDP game better than the loquacious Reps? Could the insinuation in official quarters be true that these committees were feverishly set up for publicity stunts as well as to extort money from both innocent and fraudulent companies and government agencies?


How come Hon. Lawan collected the Otedola dollars since April and we are just hearing about it at this late hour?

At what stage did the bubble burst and the relationship broke down between the giver and the taker of bribes? Where’s the money collected by Lawan and his partner, Hon.Boniface Emenalo, and was it ever sent to the Police or the House leadership as exhibit or evidence? Who originated this unholy deal that has snowballed into one of the biggest scandals ever to rock Nigeria’s National Assembly?

Why is the Nigerian Police more interested in a bribery allegation of $620,000 than the fuel subsidy scam running into over $10billion? How come no one has been detained or investigated by the Police over the can of worms in the Ministry of Petroleum and its subsidiaries? How come the President that pretended not to be affected by the fuel subsidy saga is suddenly issuing statements on the bribery disaster?


Let’s now walk across to the Zenon Chairman and ask some pertinent questions raised by some of the people I spoke to about this ugly situation? Why did Femi entertain Lawan’s bribery overture if indeed he had no case to answer? Why did he not leave the battle to be fought by those who had an issue with the Committee? Why did he have to resort to act as policeman or private detective to expose the Chairman of the Committee if he had no hidden agenda? Could it be that Femi was representing higher interests that want to discredit the probe report and cast aspersions on committee members? Who stands to gain if the Committee’s report is guillotined and the entire effort aimed at unveiling the masquerades milking us dry in the petroleum sector is aborted?  Why has the Presidency suddenly taken a keen interest in this dirty peculiar mess (Penkelemesi! a la Adelabu?).  What does the Nigerian Law say about a bribe giver, whether in reality or as a melodrama?


My strong view is that our ruling government has resorted to using its security apparatus to hunt, haunt and intimidate anyone who tries to take it on or attempt to install a new order in Nigeria. A party that has been in government and power since 1999, by hook and by crook, will never give up power without fighting with everything at its disposal. What we are witnessing is only a dress rehearsal of what is to come as we move towards 2015. The opposition must expect anything as events continue to unfold.


Unfortunately, Hon Farouk Lawan attempted to rock the boat of his own party without understanding the score. He should have known that nothing irritates the Mafia than an ungrateful godson. There were too many examples to learn from but Hon. Lawan was too naïve for his own good and definitely not for our collective interests.


This can only be a prologue.

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  • Thought provoking write up. It baffles me that the hunter has become the hunted because PDP has something to hide.

    From: Godwin Obas

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Dele, please tell us when Farouk Lawal was born, his school days and how he made it to the House of Representatives to balance your write up as you have spent the better half praising Femi Otetola. Why cant you write without praising people...if it is not Femi Otedola today, Mike Adenuga tomorrow and MKO Abiola etc etc. Praise people on your Ovation Magazine and not on serious newspaper like THISDAY please. Is this how you want to change Nigeria ???

    From: Ujunwa

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • There are so many questions begging for answers. Worst of this - is there any hope for my country? We wake up everyday to find sickening corruption details yet we are so helpless.

    From: Ty

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • I can't agree more. This is indeed a only a prologue dear Dele. But I have this sneaky feeling that Nigerians will be disappointed for the umpteenth time.

    From: Dr. Austin

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • The Czar of Nigerian Journalism, What a great piece, as usual! Thank you for bringing to my consciousness the beauty of the legendary books of James Hadley Chase, whose real names I just got to know today. Your paragraph 9 is vintage Hadley Chase master piece. I really was looking forward to this piece not ending, but despite how long it is, it ended too soon!

    On the flip side, I also realized that the culture of reading great novels like the ones you listed in this article seems to have gone with the winds. Our present generation has chosen the easier but negative way to learn through Facebook, twitter, internet surfing and the "wicked" midnight calls offered by the Shylock GSM companies. I remember after leaving secondary school in 1980, and failing to obtain the required cut-off marks to study Pharmacy at the University of Nigeria, I settled for what we called Auxillary Teacher; each time I earned my monthly salary of $71 (#142), part of my expense budget was to buy at least 2 books of this great author, James Hadley Chase. And it was a direct conversion: if the price written on the book was 75p, that stood for (#1.50k), and I paid. I became a voracious reader of these books, and actually read virtually all the titles in the country then. And it was a great intellectual investment that was to drastically improve my spoken and written English such that by the time I finally gained admission to study Pharmacy in 1982, I was truly ready. How I wish these great past of pupil scholarship can return!

    Dele, thanks again for the master piece, even though I have not reacted to the story base of your piece. You know why...I rather am praying that the Lord who is at work in these exposures would cause an implosion amongst our leaders and bring us the much sought after deliverance from the captivity of these self-centered politicians, Amen!

    From: Cyril Aninwike

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Oga Dele Momudu, why speak from both side of the mouth? Abeg advice your friend and hero Hon Farouk Lawan to return the loot jo!

    From: bigtin

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Mr Momudu,

    Follow the facts of the matter or better still educate your self on the issues at stake. Your submission is a distortion and full of crap.

    From: Ibrahim Usman

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Your questions for Otedola hollow, lazy and shallow. The truth is that even if Mr Otedola was not clean, it does not invalidate the fact that Lawan...and many other Lawmakers....have turned the oversight functions of the NA into an extortion machinery. The NA must set up another committee, as this one's report is tainted.

    From: Steve Lukpata

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • You made my day.Thanks for your insight and debt of knowledge.

    From: Bamidele Joseph

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Dele I salute you. I lack what to say about your write ups, but truly I'm increased. Keep it up.

    From: Edwin Samson Eyube

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Deja Vu!!!! I remember the days i used to buy Ovation magazine and read about how all the looters of the treasury splash the commonwealth of the people on meaningless parties.

    From: wikileaks

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • `ooh lawan why.i ve been following ur person since de return of democracy(1999). in u i saw hope for Nigeria.why did u allow this evil befall u as an individual and Nigeria @ large.money is nothing but no.and a careless misfortune can evaporate that so called amount($620000000).
    oga dele i love u . keep telling us de truth and who knows, maybe one day someday we will learn!

    From: itodo israel

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Good piece Bob Dee, but while Femi Otedola's role in this matter remains clouded, while his company stands indicted as one of the many gutting the country I believe he's not deserving of the lyrical praise in the guise of a biography you lavished on him in the earlier chapters of your piece.

    From: Temiye

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Egbon me, what more can I add? Farouk Lawan is very naive and I've said this on my Facebook wall, If he's so smart that I used to believe he was, he wouldn't have gone into such a game with an oil sheik like Femni Otedola. The Oil and Gas and Shipping businesses are the highest height of Politics. Doesn't Farouk know of how Femi Otedola intelligently removed Otunba Ojora from AP by buying the company's share from Italy? He really messed himself up, and thank God this is happening to PDP. Their days are numbered....

    From: Biodun Caston-Dada

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Unfortunately half of the comments here reek of ignorance, individuals who do not understand irony and other figures of speech, I advice them to re-read then re-think before they post comments. By the way Mr. Momodu, God will not take your reasoning away.

    From: Abdul-Azeez

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Unfortunately half of the comments here reek of ignorance, individuals who do not understand irony and other figures of speech, I advice them to re-read then re-think before they post comments. By the way Mr. Momodu, God will not take your reasoning away.

    From: Abdul-Azeez

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Unfortunately half of the comments here reek of ignorance, individuals who do not understand irony and other figures of speech, I advice them to re-read then re-think before they post comments. By the way Mr. Momodu, God will not take your reasoning away.

    From: Abdul-Azeez

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • It's time we all wake up to the reality that we are all under a serious SPELL! How on earth can these people go these miles and still work freely on the street... these will surely go down the drain again. If Lawan can do these then Dele Momodu could do worst in a country of criminals!!!

    From: Seyi Ayodele

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • On the novel reads, I concur. But on the issue bordering on the bribery scandal et al Lawan Vs Femi, I slightly disagree. Femi & Lawan must be further investigated and tried if both were found guilty. There's no other name or way to describe a thief. A thief is a thief.

    From: OLU O

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Mr Dele Momodu, i guess i have to consult you on how to design a time-travel device. Today,
    i travelled over 270,000hrs back into the days of legendary books of James Hadley Chase!. We no longer have such reading culture anymore. The bookstores and bookshops are gone!!!. Nigeria i hail thee.

    From: Engr. Lawal Lasisi alami

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Mr Dele Momodu, i guess i have to consult you on how to design a time-travel device. Today,
    i travelled over 270,000hrs back into the days of legendary books of James Hadley Chase!. We no longer have such reading culture anymore. The bookstores and bookshops are gone!!!. Nigeria i hail thee.

    From: Engr. Lawal Lasisi alami

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • You sure have a dealt a sucker punch at the matter and hit the right target. Lets wait and see if Hon. Farouk Lawan can make the corpse walk or if He'd rather bury his dead in this saga.

    From: Musa Salihu Makoju

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • This is an insightful writeup, i believe the whole leadership of Nigeria are corrupt. How come even ACN and CPC lawmakers have not complained about their outlandish paycheck.

    From: fredon

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Dele l sincerely hope you are not celebrating corruption who cares about If femi otedola is corrupt our concern as a nation is the the corruption in the national assembly that suppose to be an eye for the nation, faroouk and his nest of robbers fills the national assembly

    From: sunny toronto

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • I why do I have the impression that this is an image piece for Femi Otedola? Dele Momodu sang his praise rather too well for a piece critical of the exposed scandal. Well, Dele Momodu is an image maker, I guess the purpose of this piece if for us readers to come away with the impression that Femi Otedola is the lovable Yakuza while Farouk Lawan is the corrupt cop.

    From: Debola

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • dele, thanks again for your unbalanced criticism. the question u should be asking is, is farouk lawan a thief or not. dont blame Jonathan or pdp for this. i know u are supporting your yoruba race at all cost but be objective for once,

    From: chas ijei

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • After reading this piece, i couldn't hold myself back from laughing and shaking my head in despair, not for Nigeria anyway. lol. Only one question popped up: if Farouk was highly regarded as a man of integrity and one of the few politicians we could bank on(at least, before the castalla burst) in Nigeria, and he could fall yakata like this, then, what caliber of people remain in the House of Rep?

    From: Ajayi Oluwapelumi

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • The bane of our public officers is nothing but greed. Hon. Farouk was just greedy just like most of the members of NASS. Nigeria has suffered much from the hands of our legislooters simply on account that the NASS is supposed to be a watchdog for the people against an oppressive and profligate executive, but they have repudiated that responsibility to the civil societies and Labour movement. What we see everyday is nothing but criminal acquiescence by members of the NASS. The fact that the Executive is rotten and steals money in billions and trillions should not be a reason why the NASS should also be blackmailing and intimidating people in order to steal and loot. The whole drama is just the beginning of what is to come in no distant time.

    From: Adindu

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • I do not intend to join issues here but it will be right for all of us to say at all time what is right and correct irrespective of our interest and political affiliation. No sane man will act in the manner Hon. Farouk Lawan paraded himself as the chairman of the subsidy committee probe panel. What on earth should have given rise to the going of Otedolas house? A man to be probed is been visited by the chairman of the probe panel he is to appear before? That is the height of greed, stupidity, willful ignorance and shamelessness. It goes a long to make us all be careful of people who claim to fight for the interest of the masses. An opportunity makes a thief, a man without an opportunity sees himself as an innocent man. When we try this men with the opportunity to lead I'm certain this nation will collapse. Whoever was at work Hon. Farouk Lawan should have been careful. In all ramifications this man was never as innocent as he claims and we should be careful of all others out there opposing the system at the moment. The law can only act when one kick starts it. If you have a case against any corrupt individual in the system report it and follow it like the way Barri. Keyamo followed that of Bode George.

    From: Jude Ogbeide

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Uncle Dele, This is wonderful. Every aspect of the write up is ok. God has given you a good role in helping Nigeri I dont know why you were/are contesting for the presidency of this country. This is a good job you are doing. Lawan didnt open his eyes! He didnt remember the clash between Otedola and Dangote if not that Dnagote is strong Otedola would have rubbished him. I wait for the day I meet Otedola I will tell him all days are for the thief, but one day for the owner. I will harvest where others have not harvested. My father has blessed me before he died. I fear no evil but only the truth! God bless you.

    From: Sir Kwaxs

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Reading your article always make my day. The whole episode is like a home movie. We are all watching.

    From: Aare Olanrewaju

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • As usual a load of crap. Praise-singing is never far from this man's write-ups. I wonder why I even bother to read his column

    From: michael ech

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • I wonder when we will start learning. I can see that most writers are not objective. Is Momodu telling us that it was the Presidency that told Lawan to demand & collect the bribe? To me Otedola has done well. We need more people like him.

    From: Ola

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Yes. as a Hardly Chase reader, and in my present position, I must understand that those that leave in glass house don't throw stones. If people like Lawan can be found in this mess, then may be its only God himself that can clean Nigerians from corruption.

    From: Abdulkareem Isa Mangmer

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Dele you disappoint me that you see nothing wrong in Lawan demanding bribe in course public service. It does not matter if he was set up or not. He is a disgrace to those he purports to represent. It also does not matter what kind of man Otedola is. In this case he did the right thing not to be blackmailed by clown who has decided to abuse the trust the nation has put on him.
    Dele what is wrong is wrong , that's what I expect from this column.

    From: Uche

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • well i think this piece written by Mr Dele Momodu has just underpinned the worrying truth of our National Assembly as another avenue for greedy and money seeking politicians.

    From: Abiodun James

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Well written with the clarity of a first class journalist....just like James Hardley Chase earlier described in your memo. As i read your story every week, it gives me an opportunity to understand your values, beliefs, principles etc. Why? because you aspire to be President of Nigeria and have shown signs of one with the ability to bring change. This writing certainly took something away from that impression. I don't know Otedola too well but i agree with you that he also need to be thoroughly investigated in this matter. Your attempt to launder Hon. Farouk's image(action) at this point is a disappointment for me. It appears to me you are saying Farouk should have been more discreet in receiving the bribe - you almost suggested he should have sent a proxy. I will continue to follow your memories and hope that this is a one-off case eventually. Remain blessed

    From: Blade

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Those who criticized this write-up are just too myopic in reasoning or physically impaired, Momodu didn't take side neither did he tried to elevate any of them.....may be you should try and read it again.....Big up Bob Dee!

    From: Shemilore

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • The fact of a bribe having been solicited offered and consequently accepted as alleged by mr Otedola is not as despicable and disgusting as the knowledge that the man distinguished and highly honoured as he is is not going to be punished if found guilty and one will begin to ask,what then is the discourage for graft and helping one to the treasury if those who engage in such malfeasance and malodorous practices never get commensurate punishment

    From: Oduna

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Well......mr dele has .good marketing skills...otedola will surely like dis piece

    From: kabir

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Ujunwa, Dele did not praise Otedola in his write up. he just gave us a lesson in history so we can fully understand what we are dealing with. What he is saying is that Otedola is a poster boy for the one and only Guru of telecoms, the Tsar of oil and gas, and the silent Power House, Dr Michael Adeniyi Agbolade Isola Adenuga. Please follow his story.

    From: ikeacha01@aol.com

    Posted: 11 months ago

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  • Uncle try and balance write-up that way we your readers will also know that there is no hidden agendas to your write-up. Going back to the issue of the day I think your two friends have damage their reputations and credibility in the eyes of Nigerians people. As you may know the saying " ole gbe ole gba" your two friends both the giver and the taker are both ' confirms'. As the world knows the present government fight against corruption is empty noise so we expect the penkelemes to go the way of others and be swept under the carpet

    From: Jimmy Johnson

    Posted: 11 months ago

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